November 30, 2007

Women Troubles (1 Comment)

Filed under: KJ,Life — The Spider Herself @ 3:06 pm

There was snow again yesterday (and more today) which is pretty unusual for this early in the season. But we take what we can get! The Col., who loves driving in this kind of weather, drove the van to work to see how it would handle in two inches of snow. At our dinner of turkey burritos, he told us that it didn’t do as well as he had hoped. He told us of turning into the road that leads to his work and sliding until his front wheels hit the curb. He drove on down to the parking lot and when he tried to make that turn he went into another slide which he couldn’t get out of until the front wheels were in the grass. He thinks it might be the tires.

Also, at dinner The Col. told me how he had not done well that day in sticking with his diet. It seems some of his office mates ordered in pizza. He was determined to behave and ate his salad (with turkey- notice the recurring eating theme here?) before the smells of pizza filled the office. He was strong until mid afternoon when he saw pieces lying around and he succumbed to their siren song. He commented how he had done so well over Thanksgiving but fell off the wagon today. This innocent piece of information put him in the frying pan.

“Yes, Thanksgiving, the meal I slaved over? The one you hardly ate any of?”

“Um yeah.”

“You couldn’t find it in your heart to succumb to the glories of that meal but you fell to a cold slab of greasy Dominoes pizza?!?!?!?”

“It wasn’t Dominoes, it was Pizza Hut.”

“Oh, like that makes it better.”

To appease me he tried the candy I had made; it’s an Aplets type candy with apples and nuts. He said it was good but I am beginning to doubt his palette.

About this time a little voice popped up from the other side of the table.

“Papa, if you had gone slower you wouldn’t have slid.” Said KJ seriously. She had been thinking the whole thing through.

“Yes,” said her Papa sarcastically, “I shouldn’t go 60 miles an hour through there.”

She seriously nodded her head and said; “You should drive slow on that road like Mama does.”

She looks at me and I nod, trying to hide my smirk.

She proceeded to lecture her father, the man who has a CDL, who drove over the road trucks for awhile, who can drive anything out there, who has driven on more snowy, icy roads than she has ever been on in her whole life, the one person I want to be riding with in bad weather, on how to drive.

This morning he wondered if he should drive the van or dig the 4 wheel drive Suburban out of the shop. I told him that now that he has been told how to drive in the snow, he could probably take the van. KJ heard this and continued on with her lecture about driving slow while we shared a laugh.

You gotta be careful what you say around these here women folk, you never know what will land you in a whole heap of trouble and a lecture or two.

November 28, 2007

Deflation (1 Comment)

Filed under: HP,Life,Personalities — The Spider Herself @ 8:54 pm

As we ate our volumous feast at Thanksgiving, the one I had spent many hours cooking, my son smiled at me and said the meal was “awesome”. He thanked me when he went to bed for the “awesome” food! I felt warm with pride that I had provided my loved one with such a high rated meal (he often doesn’t feel that way about my dinners).

On Sunday we made turkey sandwiches (what took us so long, you ask? I don’t know is my honest answer). HP watched me make one up for the kids. I was putting cranberry sauce on it because they all love it when he asked: “Can us kids have just cheese sandwiches?” No said I. When it was all together I cut it up as HP mused farther about how he wasn’t going to like it and could he have just a quarter of the sandwich? He took one bite and said “Hmm! This is good!” With much restraint, I kept my mouth shut.

Last night I wasn’t feeling to hot due to a cold coming on so I decided to go easy and fix Polish Sausage, mac and cheese (from a box- cringe) and flavored beans. I figured that everyone was getting tired of having turkey, no matter how many different ways I have been fixing it. The Col. was working late so it was just the kids and I eating it up. After a large serving of sausage, two servings of mac and cheese and two servings of beans (and still wanting more) my Son grinned at me and said…

you know what is coming….

“This is awesome!”

I am completely deflated.

November 27, 2007

Stuff (1 Comment)

Filed under: Life — The Spider Herself @ 5:11 pm

Posts keep drifting into my head and then right back out again. It sure would be nice to have memory cells. I will leave off my theory about where they go for now- I’ve thrown enough of my more ‘interesting’ theories around lately.

Thanksgiving was quiet, just us five here. There was enough food for 12 people. It was really overdoing things a bit considering that the two adults are dieting and two of the kids don’t eat very much. The Boy has been known to eat as much as me so he counts more than kid status. (We are already dreading our food bill when he reaches teenagedom.) We’ve had tons of leftovers. I made a wonderful turkey nachos and a turkey, stuffing and cheese casserole. I think we’ll take a break tonight.

It’s been cold outside so the kids haven’t been out much. I make them go out but it doesn’t take long before they are complaining of being cold. I made them run around the house two times this morning before I let them back in. But they still have plenty of energy and are doing the ‘wild thing’ here in the house which drives me nuts. There is only so much running and screaming and yelling these old nerves can take. Plus there are the considerable ‘accidents’ that come from rough housing. I have become hard hearted and tell them that if they choose to act that way then they have to accept the consequences and most importantly of all- don’t come crying to me! I really appreciated how well they played together on Wednesday before Thanksgiving. I was cooking away in the kitchen when they decided to have a birthday part for a favorite stuffed animal. They pulled out all the stuffed animals, gathering them around the honoree and sang Happy Birthday. It kept them occupied for quite some time and it was fun to hear them cooperating together. Of course, it took some time before all the stuffed party guests were put back in their homes but a Mother can’t have everything.

The Col. may be sleeping slightly more better. (I like to use good grammar to impress you all.) But some of it may be that he is going to bed every night between 7-9 so even if he wakes up at 3:30 he has gotten a fair amount of sleep. It’s not the best for family life but at least he’s more alert during the day. Or at least, that’s the theory. I know, I know, I promised no harebrained theories for this post but it just slipped out.

I had better go before I let anything else slip.

Have I ever told you what I think about the number three?

November 23, 2007

Sleepus Interuptus (3 Comments)

Filed under: Life — The Spider Herself @ 1:20 pm

I crawled back into bed after getting up for the second time with T last night. She has a cold and has been thrashing about a bit more than usual. Mind you, it’s not easy to thrash about in her bed with all the dolls and books she has stashed in there but somehow she manages. I don’t have to do much when I get up with her, just cover her up or stroke her head but any interruption to my sleep goes against my sloth like nature and is considered a horrible event.

I lay my weary body down, weary from cooking for two days and then cleaning up (The Col. helped with that which was wonderful!) and then I heard it.

Click, click, click.

I knew that sound. I had heard it about three times here in the last few months.

Click, click, click.

It was The Dog pacing in the utility room. That was not good.

I tried to ignore it.

Click, click, click.

It wasn’t going away. I considered waking The Col. because even though I may occasionally take pity on the poor creature and feed him, he is The Col.’s dog. But then my heart felt pity on the poor man who hasn’t been sleeping well. It was two AM. If I woke him then he probably would not go back to sleep and if I let him sleep then he would get another hour and a half- until about 3:30 which has been when he wakes up, apparently, just for the fun of it.

Click, click, click.


It was getting desperate and even though The Col. seems to wake up at the drop of a hat, he doesn’t ever seem to wake up when his Dog needs him.


Up I get, drag myself out, put my feet on the cold hard floor of the utility room and let the poor guy out. I get a blanket and curl up in a fetal position on the couch until I hear him back on the porch. He was certainly acting perky for such an awful hour. I was grateful there was enough oxygen hanging around for my activity. I am a firm believer that there isn’t oxygen at those hours of the night. To prove to me otherwise you would have to get me up and encourage activity and then I would have to seriously harm you. That would not be a good thing so we will leave it as unproven scientific fact.

The Col. insists that there is enough oxygen at 3:30 when he has been waking up (today being no exception) but I figure that is probably what is causing his whole sleep problem. His poor brain cells are oxygen deprived at that time and causing them to misfire.

That’s my theory and I am sticking to it!

And next time he had better take care of his dog!

November 19, 2007

Snow (1 Comment)

Filed under: Life — The Spider Herself @ 6:47 pm

We woke up to it lying lovely white around us.

The kids were excited.

The Mother was not so just because she knows the work involved in getting everyone outside in it. Layers of clothes, find the gloves, complain about no clean socks (I wish someone would do their laundry!), sort out whose hat is whose, etc. and so forth. But just because I see the negative in everything doesn’t mean the kids can’t go out and enjoy.

So….. we went through the whole ordeal. Made sure everyone had gone to the bathroom. Yelled numerous times about not walking through the house from one door to the other with their muddy boots on. Listened to the complaints about the hat being too tight. Got the gloves on upside down but convinced her they would still work. Just so that two of them could stand on the porch. You see, snow is crunchy, for goodness sakes, and that is scary!

But The Boy and I had a good snowball fight and built a snowman. While the peanut gallery stood safely on the fringes, watching. I got K finally to venture out to put the eyes on the snowman. The crunchiness didn’t kill her, surprise! Although she did walk pretty carefully. So then I dragged T around the yard by the hand to prove to her that crunchy snow was not deadly.

Then The Boy was playing with The Dog and slipped on the rocks injuring his hand. Let’s just say I am ever thankful that the neighbors don’t live close or they would think that I torture that child the way he screams when he is hurt. It was decided it was time to go in. T’s hands tend to get really cold even with gloves on and they can really hurt her so it was just as well.

They got hot chocolate when we came in. They still think snow is pretty neat.

I am waiting for my mood to improve which will hopefully happen before it snows again.

Now, you all, watch out for that Horrid Crunchy Snow! Don’t let it get you!

November 16, 2007

What We are Reading (3 Comments)

Filed under: Life — The Spider Herself @ 11:45 am

*Edited for clarity. See last big paragraph.*

(Or an alternate title: I should be cleaning but am in a really rotten mood so I am blogging) 🙂

Am I reading the wonderfully bound copy of Pride and Prejudice by Jane Eyre that my Dad lent me ages ago? Am I reading the book about Corrie Ten Boom titled The Five Silent Years by Pamela Rosewell Moore that I should return to the friends who are coming over for dinner tonight? No. I am not expanding my classical literary knowledge or my faith. I am reading Baking Illustrated- The Practical Kitchen Companion For The Home Baker. (I did not pay this much for it! Ack!) How does one ‘read’ a cookbook? I don’t know but I find the plot fascinating, the techniques interesting and the end results thrilling. See, I told you I was twitchy.

When we go to the library I end up grabbing books for the kids that look interesting. I don’t spend a lot of time perusing them because of our limited attention and quiet span. Unfortunately, I end up with duds part of the time. You know, the books that make you wonder how they were ever published in the first place. Ones where kids act awful and there are no consequences or morals thrown in. Those books quickly find their way to the bottom of the pile or I downright refuse to read them again. But this last trip I came home with some gems. One is called Museum Trip by Barbara Lehman . It is a wordless book about a boy’s adventures in a museum. It’s fun because we can speculate as to what is going on and add our own conversations. The pictures have detail that we can talk about and it leaves it open as to what actually happened. The one I picked out for me, because I am so sloth-like myself, is Score One for the Sloths by Helen Lester . It’s about a school of sloths that is threatened to be shut down by a Wild Boar (you can tell he is wild by the way he dresses) and how one plucky sloth named Sparky saves the day. Again the illustrations are good and there is lots of things to spot that help the story. The last really neat one is called The Quiltmakers Gift by Jeff Brumbeau and illustrated by Gail de Marcken. I love the pictures in it, there is much to look at and absorb! The story is a bit over long but even the girls can sit through it. The vague disturbance I have with it is that God is missing from the story. But I try to emphasis to the kids that all the wonderful things the King owned didn’t make him happy but by giving them to others who needed them he gained joy. The blessings of giving is a wonderful thing for little ones to learn. I kept trying to emphasis this as we selected things for our Operation Christmas Child shoe boxes yesterday. These things were not for us but for kids who have nothing and this will be a blessing to them.

The Col. reads to The Boy every night. They have been reading through the Sugar Creek Gang series (we have the full set). But The Col. was getting a bit tired of them so for a break I suggested they read (some of you will appreciate this more than others) Hank the Cowdog. They read the Priceless Corncob one. I haven’t seen The Col. laugh so hard in years. Tears were rolling down his cheeks. He wondered how he went so many years without reading one. After he was an adult he knew some kids (yes, DH- yours) that read them but he figured he was too manure mature to read them at that time.

Ah, the joys we discover now with our own children that we somehow missed in our own childhood.

Now, I guess I had better clean house, company tonight.

November 15, 2007

Gum, gum every where (4 Comments)

Filed under: HP,KJ,Life,Personalities — The Spider Herself @ 9:16 am

I awoke to hear footsteps coming down the hall. It wasn’t terrible early but it’s a day when The Col. leaves early and I like to lounge in bed for a bit. It wasn’t the usual footsteps that I hear early in the morning. The Otter had already been up surveying the situation and had quietly gone back to bed. These footsteps were bigger, louder so I knew it was The Boy. He paused inside the door. I contemplated not opening my eyes but he lingered long enough I thought I’d take a peek. He saw the eyes.


Sigh. What?

“K dropped gum in my bed and it’s all over me! And the bed!”

Groan. Al l right I’ll be there in a minute.

As I got up and dressed I heard him jumping around in his room. I finally figured out it was to try and stay warm. I was actually feeling a wee bit sorry for him.

I headed back and first tried rubbing it off with my fingers. The Boy doesn’t have a high tolerance for pain and he is not quiet about expressing himself. After a few shrieks in my ear I decided that wasn’t working and we went to the bathroom to use a washcloth. I tried a warm washcloth because the poor skinny thing was pretty cold but that tended to soften it and cause it to get gummy again so it was taking quite a bit of rubbing. I’d work on one area, the inside of his leg, and then another, one of his arms, so that one area wouldn’t get too tender. All the while listening to the shrieks coming from his poor tortured mouth. I was hoping to get his leg cleaned off so he could get pants on to help him warm up. I was cursing K and contemplating a gum ban for her and possibly the world when she wandered in.

The Boy yelled at her that it was all her fault. She confessed that it had fallen out of her mouth when they were wrestling and that they had looked for it but couldn’t find it.

Wait a minute! THEY looked for it? Did H know it was there? Why yes, the (I really want to put “idiot” here but we don’t allow name calling in our house) precious child did know it was there. They looked for it in their childish way, exactly where they thought it landed and couldn’t see it so they promptly stopped looking. Nor did they tell a Parental Unit about said lost gum.

I promptly stopped feeling even the teeniest amount of sympathy and rubbed to my hearts content.

The gum is off The Boy but is still on the sheets. I’ll have to figure out how to get it off of there next.

What a way to start the day.

November 12, 2007

Is it just me? (3 Comments)

Filed under: Life — The Spider Herself @ 5:26 pm

Or is the Col.’s Grinchiness finally rubbing off?

I used to love Christmas…. before I married Col. Grinch.

I am trying to be organized and get ideas (at least) for the kids’ Christmas presents. Now, don’t anyone go telling me they are all through, finished, done with the lot. I will seriously roll my eyes at you. Feel threatened? Really, I think I am doing well to even be thinking about it. As Col. Grinch says- “why worry about it now, when you can really feel the stress on Dec. 24th?” See!?!?!

So I go a browsing on line and through catalogs for ideas. Might even go hog wild and buy something. That’s when I hit the brick wall. I want to get my kids a few nice things that they will enjoy. Not tons of junk that will sit in a corner. Not so much ‘stuff’ that their eyes glaze over with gluttony on Christmas morning. Just a few well chosen gifts.

But what do I find out there? Toys based on TV shows or movies- which we seldom watch and which my kids don’t seem too interested in outside of the show. Noisy toys intended to drive Parents insane. I feel like the Grinch now saying “noise, Noise, NOISE!” Why must all toys require batteries and make annoying sounds? Since we are a nation of wealth and personally, we accumulate things; we have already have much of what is being offered. Cooking things, dolls, stuffed animals, cars, airplanes, Legos and Gears. How much more of that… stuff do we need? Need, of course, not really being the word to use because we don’t need any of it.

My Dad, one of eight children, who grew up in the 30’s says they would get one pair of mittens each or a sled to share between them. They were happy. Some of his fondest memories was of the things Grandma baked at Christmas. To this day he gets terribly grumpy if he doesn’t get Christmas goodies. I think he associates it with love and the joy of Christmas. What will my kids associate with Christmas when they are in their 70s?

Now, we feel guilty somehow if the Tree is not almost covered with presents. We have some friends, whose children are young adults now, who commented to us when HP was a little guy that they wished they hadn’t gone so over board with Christmas presents when their kids were young. Then, when they wished to de-emphasis the presents and glorify the True Gift of the Season; they were finding it hard to do. How many gifts is too many? I found this lady who says they give four gifts each year. One for what the child wants. One for what they need. One that is practical. And one that is Spiritual. I have been mulling that around. My Mom is the Queen of being “fair”- which usually means trying to get the same number of presents and spend the same on everyone. Man, that takes a lot of energy!

But I am still stuck for ideas. I think I want the kids to be thrilled with what they get and therefore put more pressure on myself then need be. At this age, they are happy often with opening presents and having new things- no matter what it is. That will change as we age.

I am sure I will find something for everyone. Eventually. Hopefully before Dec. 24th. I will bake, decorate and wrap. Dragging my Grinch along with me because I am a glutton for punishment. Or it could be because I love the Old Devil.

I was intending to go on a rant about the toys offered out there and how so many just seem unattractive. And of course, made in China- that Eviiil place. But somehow it ended up being more of a commentary about Christmas presents in general. What are your thoughts about presents and Christmas? Just call me the Wife of Grinch.

Maybe I should dye my hair green.

Thank you! (0 Comments)

Filed under: Uncategorized — The Spider Herself @ 12:16 pm

A very big Thank You to all who served our Country or who are currently serving. Where would we be without you? Our Country stands strong because of people like you!

Today, hug your favorite veteran!

November 8, 2007

Five (0 Comments)

Filed under: KJ,Personalities — The Spider Herself @ 10:54 am

“It’s a girl!”

What am I going to do with a girl?

After five years, I still wonder that.

She was beautiful.

She still is.

She had large almost black eyes. They are chocolate brown now with long lashes

Her hair was kinky at first. I thought What genetic throw back is this? But it washed out and she had curly hair for awhile. It still has body and curls easy.

She is girl to the core. Pink and lace and frills. But she will also wrestle with her brother, sister and father.

She has always known what she wants. No waffling for this girl. It’s another genetic throw back.

I remember being huge and exhausted while pregnant with T, so K was less than 18 months old and I was  saying something along the lines of “I suppose I should change your diaper.” Not really meaning it because then I would have to get up. Quite a daunting thought. She would head down the hall and if I didn’t follow fast enough come back looking for me, wondering what was taking me so long. We have learned to really mean it when we say something.

She is helpful, kind, energetic, decisive, funny. She is my middle child, my first girl, joy of my heart.

Happy Birthday KJ!